I like it when you talk, talk, dirty when you talk, talk.

Hello world. (:

It was a great day today!

I had Ichiban Sushi for lunch with my boyfriend, and then we went to watch 'The Apparition'.

It's a horror movie, but it's not very frightening. In addition, the plot and the ending was pretty stupid. I have this stereotype about English horror movies though, I'm not sure if anyone feels the same way, but I personally feel that all of them do not pack enough suspense.

Anyway, we then had Seoul Garden with Narisa and my mum, then we headed home. (:

Met Victoria on the bus, was kinda happy to see her again. I wonder how she's doing.

Well, there's a lot of things that are happening lately, and honestly, I can't comprehend it.

It seems like the word 'Love' comes so easy nowadays. It's disappointing to see how someone can put in their entire heart into a relationship, and end up being wounded.

And the reason for the other leaving would be,

"I just don't love you anymore."

"I'm not sure of my feelings for you."

"I've fallen for someone else."

Really?



If you had really loved her in the first place, you wouldn't have hurt her. You wouldn't have left her. You wouldn't have left her crying for you to come back. So tell me. What is love to you?

It just angers me to see people getting hurt because of the shit people do, and don't tell me that it's none of my business, because I've done the shit that they've done, and I've opened my eyes and gotten myself out of it.

If you're not sure of a relationship, then here's my advice.

Don't get into it.

You'll know if you're ready.

You'll never wanna lose that person, you'l never wanna make them cry, and all that you'll wanna do is to be there for them all the time.

That relationship, would become both of your responsibilities.

Don't get into a relationship when all you're looking for are thrills, or you're planning to cheat on them. To see if they're the right one, Or to simply test the water.

Once you've hurt them, you've hurt them. I know that people heal in time. But it isn't easy.



Today, I was looking through Facebook, when I came across a shared picture. It goes like this.



Here's the description for it.

Don’t stop chasing.
I think that one of the biggest reason why relationships do not work out in the long run is because at one point, one side (or both) stops trying. Before one claims another person as their significant other, they would do anything to make that person happy. They would chase, they would flirt, they would be charming. They would send daily morning and goodnight texts every time you wake up or go to sleep. They would write corny messages and pick up lines just to make sure that there is a smile upon your face. But once they claim you as theirs, all of those things eventually stop. The 5 page texts slowly turn into 1. The constant calls turn into not calling at all. And the lovely endearments turn into daily arguments. In order for a relationship to work, don’t ever stop chasing. Just because the person you want is now consider “yours”, it does not mean they deserve anything less than the time when you’re trying to win them over. ♥

Sure. I do get the part of always appreciating what the other is doing for you, but I do not agree on the word 'chasing'.

What is that?

Relationships are not about the chase.

They're about doing everything you can to sustain it, and giving your hundred percent without taking your partner's for granted. They're about telling the entire your world that your love, your relationship, is stronger than anything else in the world, and nothing else can ever break it apart.

What's a chase compared to so much love?

A chase is nothing but a thrill. If a relationship is entirely based on chase, then if one gets tired, you're saying that it's over?

I'd really like to question the person whom wrote this, and I sincerely hope that if you're one of those people that hurt others, you'll get your eyes opened soon.

With that, I'm leaving you this question.

What's a relationship to you?

Love,
Natalie Ishot


HELLOOOOOO, AND SO HERE IT IS, THE KAO LIESE CASSIS BERRY REVIEW!




INTRODUCTION

I started dyeing my hair in this year, and up till today, I've used 4 packages of dyes, and all of them are from Liese. I used them in this order.

Mocha Orange

Marshmellow Brown

Sweet Apricot

Cassis Berry (Current)

I do not really have a good reason for using Liese, but if I had to come up with one, I'd say that it's because of the wide colour range that they have to offer, and the leave-on conditioner that they give in every package!

Of course, as said in advertisements and all, Liese's hair dyes are also pretty fun to use because of the bubbly foam, and the evenness of the colour dye that your hair is supposed to get.

I think that the only problem with their dyes is the pungent smell of ammonia. It's really strong, and peee-ew, about 10 minutes into the process of dyeing my hair, my little sister had abandoned all plans of watching me and had fled out of the bathroom like a wild pokemon.

As for people with virgin hair and are considering to try Liese, I would like to highlight one thing to take note of.

Liese does offer a wide range of colours, but for the first time that I dyed my hair (Mocha Orange), the colour was not obvious at all. It seemed too natural to deem as 'dyed'. If you're going for a more obvious change, do consider taking a lighter hair colour.

And nowwww, let's go for the review!

This is the colour of my hair (Sweet Apricot) before dyeing.



Black roots (':


CASSIS BERRY!



SIDE OF THE BOX



Was hoping for the second column of colour!

Before the start of dyeing your hair, do always wear a old t-shirt to prevent any dye from staining your shirt! Also, do not ever dye your hair when it is wet. It'd never work out.

ITEMS IN THE PACKAGE



Leave-on hair conditioner on the left, and gloves on the right.



The two bottles of chemicals that you're supposed to mix together.


Anddddd, LET'S BRING ON THE FOAAM!





Doesn't it look like there's candy floss on my hair? :>

One more thing about Liese is that, to achieve maximum absorbing of the dye, a time span of about 45 minutes is encouraged for the leaving on of dye.

Sooooo, a couple of pictures before the washing of my hair!



Yes I did, Yes I did,
Somebody please tell me who the eff' I is,
Iam Nicki Minaj I mack them dudes up
Back coupes up, and chuck the deuce up



*Awkward Silence*



And maybe if I wish hard enough, unicorns would be attracted to my pink foamy hair.

What did I say about having fun with the foam?

ANYWAY,

After washing off the foam from my hair in 45 minutes time, I then applied the Leave-on conditioner. No matter how good a hair dye is, it'd always damage your hair. Always.

And Tadaaaah.

(Under the light)





My darker roots are still slightly visibleee.

Gaah, the consequences of dyeing your hair.

(Dimly lit room)



After all the pink foam, I'm a lil' disappointed at the outcome. It wasn't really that bright like I've expected and instead, it turned out to be more of a lighter brown colour, quite similiar to the Sweet Apricot that I've used previously, with a slight tint of red.

Oh well.

But I did have fun, and Liese's still my recommended brand for those that want to try dyeing their hair. Simply because the colour is even, and it's application is simple. (:

That's all for the review huns, hope it helps!

For more information, do email me at natalie.ishot@hotmail.com.

Thank you! (:

Love,
Natalie Ishot




Oh really? Please tell me more.

Hello earthlings. (:

I've finally dyed my hair, and I'm pretty satisfied with it, except for the teeny bit of uneven-ish at the back.



I know I promised a review, and it'd come up in the next post. (:

The start of UT3 is tomorrow, and honestly, I still don't feel any urgency for it. I studied for half an hour, and I just couldn't concentrate anymore.



#Firstworldproblems.

But I just don't get it. I wonder where did the drive of working hard went to. I'd really like to find out. My grades aren't slipping, and I'm still doing pretty well in school, but this attitude is not going to get me anywhere.

And today, there was something in my mind to ponder about.

I was reading my previous posts, when I came across the uber long story that I've written for my Art Of Story Module.

Then I remembered of what my facilitator said during class.

"We're all damaged goods."

This sentence didn't really make sense to me until today.

I'm not only talking about perfection, I'm talking about how we would always go through something in life that would change or affect us in a certain way.

In some way, we've all been hurt.

When we talk about damaged goods, we're referring to something about us that can never be changed.



Well, I wouldn't exactly say that there's something wrong with us, but I do ask myself that question for many times before.

Like how I react to certain situations so harshly, and how I want my own space so badly. I hate it when people invade my personal space and try to get control over it. I flare up so easily when it comes to that topic.

And that's only because I didn't get the freedom that normal teenagers had when I was in secondary school.

Life is funny.

My friends would die to get a ride home from school, while I, sat at the backseat of the car, and wished that I could take the bus home.

That's why they always say,

"You always want what you can't have."

My friends would be going out after school, while I, would have to sit at home to face the walls.

I'm not asking for lots of freedom. Sometimes, I just want some time alone, in the bus, to think about the things that I need to think about.

Outings with my friends were rare.

I didn't get to have that freedom until it was after my 'O' levels.

Now things are pretty much better, and honestly, I'm grateful for that. But of course, whatever that has happened, obviously impacted me a lot.

So, we're all damaged goods huh?

I guess, that's what life is about.

Spending your entire life trying to find of how to live with it, or to make you feel better again.

Things in the past can never be changed, but your future is still ahead of you,

and you,

Can Decide On What Path To Take.

And that's all for today, with an update that's coming up in my couple blog soon. (:

Love,
Natalie Ishot








That's what our flaws are for, the perfection of us.

Hello earthlings! (:

Yesterday was the last day of school, and so, I'll be using this post to express my gratitude to some of my classmates.

Xiu Jun



Hello Ah Keng, I listed you first because to be honest, you're the closest friend to me in class. Although you're being crazy and nonsensical for 95% of the time, there are some things that you've said that have really made sense. And I admire you, of how you're able to sacrifice your own feelings for the one you love, just so that they wouldn't be caught in the middle. You're really not what you seem, and Qi Ying has definitely seen that in you. You look like any ordinary guy, but really, once someone gets to know you, they're definitely in for a surprise! I'm really glad that you've found Qi Ying, and I hope that you guys can really, really, last long. Thank you for always being there for me whenever I'm feeling down, and for all the jokes and gossips that we've shared. AND, for introducing me to Qi Ying, she's the cutest girl, ever. Okay, chicken is calling, I go feed them already, end of your section.


Charman

Kissonyou, not a very wise choice ah. I doubt that I'll ever be able to forget you, because you're so damn straightforward. Not because you're pretty, or you're cute, or you win me by a bit, although you are pretty la okay. I'd like to thank you for always randomly office communicating me, and the stupid conversations we have, which usually consist of gossips, bitching, and my fail rainbowssssss. Most importantly, I've realized that goodness, Charman is actually caring leh. Remember that one time that everyone had gone for their break, and I was in class alone? You asked me if I wanted to eat anything, and if there's something that I want, I could just give you a call? You even asked me if I wanted to hang out with you and your friends, and told me, "Don't worry la, they all very friendly one." All these, as mushy and yucks as they sound, I remember. The one that's etched into my mind forever is when I was crying at the corridor, and you and XJ actually made the effort to look for me. Thank you. (R)



Likhock

Hello. Now, I understand. I understand all of your actions, and all that you've sacrificed. I understood after talking to Bryan during our AOS fieldtrip, when he was eating Ya kun kaya toastttttttt. I really appreciate it. I know that at times, we dont see eye to eye, but I am glad to still be friends with you even after the semester has ended. I would also like to apologize if at times, I joke around and my words have hurt you, I don't mean any of it. Lastly, I'll never forget those super guailan moments that we've had, unfortunately. HAHAHA. But yeah, thank you. Really.

Bryan

Pokemon Master eh? This one's to the guy that I knew long before our class had started! I'd really like to thank you for the talks that we've had, especially the one we had during the AOS fieldtrip. It really helped me a lot. Do you remember the first few lessons that we had, and we took the MRT home together? Remember the small talks we had? I do. Bryan, don't ever let anyone put you down, and always do what you want to do. There will never be a day where you are left with no choice, because in this world, there will always be options to choose from. You're more than what you think you are, and one day, you'll see it. Be confident of yourself! (:

Jeevan

Thanks for treating me to ice cream. That's all. Bye. No, I'm joking. HAHAHA. To be honest, when I had first met you, I thought that I would hate you to the core. I was thinking to myself, 'This guy is going to be damn boring.' Because honestly, I thought that you were boring. And too serious. Guess what? I was wrong. YOU'RE EXOTIC, I don't know how to put it in words, but you're really special. I mean like, you're like a coffee bean in the north pole. I've never seen someone so humble and powerful with words in my entire life. Thank you for always asking me if I would like to grab a bite before you go down for a break, and asking me if anything is wrong whenever I'm down. It's deeply appreciated. I will never forget the day where we sat down, ate ice cream, and shared personal stories with each other.

Of course, there are many more classmates which I'll never forget, but these are just the few that I feel really bonded with. Girls like Ru Weeeee and Fatin, I honestly had a lot of fun reading out your tweets and stalking the both of you.

"I tried to find familiarity among the strange."

"So Fatin, you tell me, how do you find love in a rocketship? It doesn't make sense and you still haven't explained it to me."

And Raghini, the girl with the silent 'G'. *Burst into giggles*.

Charlene, the damn crazy girlll, jiao ni ah ma lai lorrrrrrrrrr.

Firman, the walking beatboxer, RAAH RAAH LIKE A DANCING DRAGON.

All in all, I think that our class is the most united of all! I don't see other classes rushing to TRCC, booking a whole table, and eating together. (:

We're plain whacky. Of course.

I love you guys, do say hi to each other when we happen to pass by, and I do hope that in the next semester, I'll be lucky enough to have one or two of you as my classmates, again!

This last paragraph actually goes out to Savitha, I don't know whether she'll see this, but I'm going to type it out anyway.

Hi Savitha, the semester is over, and I honestly do hope that you know what you're doing. Honestly, all of us don't know what's going on with you, but it is very heartbreaking to see someone throw their education away. Life's there for a reason and a purpose, and that's for you to learn. In a country like Singapore, it is very hard to go anywhere without the basics of education. If there's something that you want out there, work hard to achieve it. Things do not simply come without effort. Money's not easy to earn, and I'm pretty sure that all of our parents had done a lot to put us into schools. Don' let this chance go to waste, because there might not be another one. On the behalf of the whole class, I would like to say a word of sorry, if we've hurt you in anyway. Please think about this.

Love,
Natalie Ishot


Hello earthlings!

In this post, I'd be posting up the story that I had created for my module, Art Of Story. If you're interested in reading the entire story, go ahead! (: If not, there's my other blog entry after this post, so scroll down!




Dave

Backstory

I will always remember of the day when my parents had passed away. The murdering was so quick, that no policeman in this city was ever able to find the culprit behind my parents’ death.

I was six years old then, when my parents had decided to bring me to watch the blockbuster movie, ‘Tomb Raider’. It was an action packed movie, which starred a famous actress, an Angelina Jolie of some sort. When we entered the movie theatre, I realized that it was fully packed. People jostled to find their seats, and when we finally found ours, the movie had just begun. In the movie, there were gunshots, flashes of fighting scenes, and when all of it was finally over, the sky had already turned into a blanket of darkness.

Father and Mother held my hand as they lead me to the car park, where our red Volkswagen was parked at. The air was still, and there was no one else but us in the area. Looking down at my feet, I playfully tried to synchronize my footsteps with my parents’.

Suddenly, they stopped walking.

I waited for them to walk on, but it seemed like they were frozen on their tracks. Something was wrong.

When I looked up, I saw five men, about five metres away from us. They all had masks on their faces, and the one in the middle sported a biker jacket. They certainly did not look friendly.

“…Mummy? Can we leave?” I whispered and tugged at her sleeve as the men started to approach us.

“Stand back.” My mother ordered, as she took a step in front and held onto my shoulders protectively.

Soon, the five men had surrounded us. All of them sported menacing grins, and I could feel my mother’s grip on me turned as cold as ice.

“What do you want?” My father said sternly.

“Nothing, sir. We came to say… Hello.” The man with the biker jacket said and smiled, as his eyes glanced from my father’s gold watch to me.

In a blink of an eye, he then took a silver knife out of his pocket. As I looked around frantically, I realized that the others were armed too. My mother must have noticed it too, as in a moment, her voice rang through the empty car park.
“Dave, run!” With a push, my mother tried to clear a way for me out as Father delivered a low blow onto the leg of the man with the jacket. Air escaped from my lungs rapidly as I ran faster than I had ever ran. When I looked back, I saw a single man chasing after me, while the others started beating Father up. I barely made a few metres away from the men, when the one chasing after me easily caught up and grabbed me by my shirt.

When I was dragged back to where my parents were at, my father’s face was already beaten to a pulp. His right eye swelled till his pupil could not be seen, and his leg was twisted into a weird angle. Unwilling to give in, Father grabbed the man’s trousers.

“L.. Let… them… go.” He pleaded.

“Get your filthy hands off me.” With one last kick onto my father’s face, he left him motionless on the ground.

“No!” My mother screamed, as the other men started to drag her to a wall, and pin her against it. Mother struggled against their hands, but even I know that it was of no use.

Holding the silver knife in his hands, the man with the jacket then started to walk towards my mother. As he stood in front of her, Mother then whimpered for her dear life.

“Please… Please let us go, I beg you.” Mother pleaded and she looked at the man, as he held the knife across her neck.

The man gave no mercy.

I watched in horror, as with just one slit, blood started spluttering out from Mother’s throat, turning her white chiffon blouse into a crimson red. Her struggles turned weaker, and she fought to stay alive. In a minute, the men loosened their grip on Mother and she stopped struggling with her knees giving way. Mother sunk to the ground, with her eyes wide open. She did not move, and her eyes stared coldly into space.

Turning around, the man with the jacket then looked at me. My eyes stayed glued onto Mother’s body, as it dawned onto me that both of my parents were dead. I tried to scream, but my voice could not escape from my throat.

“Finish him off.” The man commanded.

The man holding onto me pushed me to the ground, and stepped onto my stomach. I felt the whole of his weight on me, and I cringed in pain. He crouched above me, and raised his right fist. With one huge blow onto my nose, I blacked out.


“Dave. Wake up, please.” A familiar voice said, as I stared into an abyss of darkness.

Am I dead? Was I in heaven? Nothing seemed clear anymore.

“Dave, open your eyes, please.” The voice called again.

Who was that? I wondered. I strained my ears, to listen for that voice again. It was then I could faintly make out a rhythmic beeping sound from the background. It then struck me that the beeping came from a heart monitor, and that I was in a hospital. I wasn’t dead.

I struggled to open my eyes, and when I finally did, I was greeted with a glare of light, coming from the ceiling. In discomfort, I shielded my eyes with my hands.

“Dave! You’re awake!” The voice exclaimed. I looked to my left, and I saw Grandpa. Using my arms as a support, I struggled to sit up. A familiar pain formed on my stomach, and I groaned in respond. Grandpa lived in a small farm located at the south of Australia, and on every summer vacation, my parents would bring me there to visit him.

It was then I remembered.

My parents were dead. Murdered.

My heart ached almost immediately, and tears threatened to spill from my eyes. I held onto the bed rails, as my lungs heaved for air. Sorrow and anger overwhelmed me as the scenes of the murder flashed in my mind. I hugged my knees for comfort and soon, I was sobbing.

Standing up from his seat, Grandpa placed his arms around me and drew me into an embrace. “Oh Dave, everything will be alright. I’ll always be here for you. Do you hear me? Always.”

During my stay in the hospital, policemen visited me for investigations. My head throbbed as I was forced to repeat the events of that night. I was tired, and the repeated sighs that the policemen made as they walked out of the room slowly convinced me that those killers would never be found.

I was discharged a few days later, and after much paperwork, my custody was given to Grandpa, my next closest of kin. Bags were packed and things were cleared. Soon, I found myself sitting beside Grandpa in his truck, my luggage at the back, waving goodbye to the house that I had lived in ever since I was born. Grandpa placed his left hand on mine, and started the engine.

Life was tough without my parents. When I was enrolled into a new school, I felt out of place. On every morning, children streamed in, with their hands in their parents’. As for me, I only had Grandpa. Many had questioned me about the absence of my parents, and all the time, I had kept silent. Once, a brunette girl had approached me and asked, “Where are your parents?” I don’t know what came over me, but on that day, I snapped.

“They’re dead. My father was hit to death and my mother was slit by the throat. What about yours?”

Her eyes wide with horror, the brunette girl ran away screaming. She never spoke to me again.

Ever since that day, word had spread, and everyone that I knew started to treat me extra nicely. Whenever I had forgotten to bring my stationaries, classmates would immediately flock to me to lend me some, while the Fat Sam that sat behind me was never given any help. I hated it. Sometimes, I wished that I was Fat Sam. I wanted to be unnoticed. I wanted to blend into the walls. Life would be so much easier, so much less painful. Aren’t I a normal kid? After all, I’m just a kid... A kid without parents.

Of course, with the special attention, comes the jealousy. Those boys at the back, they started picking on me. My chair was often kicked, and when the teacher isn’t looking, they’d throw paper balls at me. I couldn’t do much, and I didn’t want to do anything about it either. No one will ever understand the pain that I’m enduring, not even Grandpa. Attracting more sympathy and attention was the last thing I wanted. And so, I endured. I endured the kicks, the snickers, and the stupid paper balls. Hatred and anger swallowed me, as I endured all of these till I entered high school.

By then, my blond fringe had made its way down to my cheeks, and I had taken a habit of wearing a grey hoodie to cover up my face. I’d walk to school, bag pack on my back, and hands in my pockets. But these weren’t enough to hide me from the jocks in school.

One day, I found myself facing them as I was walking home from school. It seemed like an ambush, as they slowly walked out from the two lanes of the forked road that I was heading towards to. Soon, I was surrounded by them. I immediately recognized Danny as one of them, the leader of the pack.

“Ah, the one with the hoodie.” Danny smirked as he observed me from head to toe.

“Leave me alone.” I muttered under my breath, as I tried to make my way pass them.

“Not so fast, boy. Let’s go somewhere else, shall we?” Danny replied and signalled his friends to grab me.

With that, I was grabbed by the shoulders, and I was forced to move along with them. I thought of retaliating, but judging from those bulging forearms they had formed from rugby games, I knew that I’d be asking for more trouble.

Soon, I was led to an alley, one that winded down to a green dumpster at the end. Danny and his friends then proceeded to take lighters out of their pockets, together with a brown stick, no longer than five centimetres. It didn’t look like a cigarette. Within the brown paper, was what seemed like grass. Within a minute, the brown sticks were lighted up, and the jocks were puffing on them.

“Isn’t that… Isn’t that weed?” I stuttered.

Danny then walk towards me, and blew a puff of smoke onto my face. The pungent smell of it made me cough in revulsion.

“Why, what a smart boy. Why don’t you try it?” Danny grinned, and challenged me for a puff.

I was about to decline his offer, when just then, I paused. How long more was I planning to hide? How long more was I planning to endure the same shit every single day? Blending into the walls, letting this pain suffocate me, wasn’t the bullying in elementary school enough? It’s time to pick myself up, and show the world that I do not need their sympathy. It’s time, for them to know that I am not weak.

Without any more hesitation, I took the stick from Danny, and smoked it. The pungent smell of weed filled my throat, and my eyes watered as my stomach threatened to spill out my lunch. But I was determined to get all of this together. I exhaled the smoke, and looked at Danny and the other jocks. They were clearly impressed.

From that day onwards, I was invited to join their clique. I was invited to night parties, and the days flew past with scenes of the night life, alcohol, girls and weed. I no longer rushed home immediately after school. On countless occasions, Grandpa had tried to stop me from my actions, but I had started to turn a deaf ear on him.

“Dave, wake up from this! What have you became? Look at yourself!”

“Shut up, and stay out of this.” I’d slammed the front door, and walk away.

With so much entertainment to satisfy ourselves with, we soon ran out of money. Weed was too expensive to get, and girls started to shun us when they realized that we were dead broke. Hence, on a Friday afternoon, Danny finally came up with a plan to get us back on track.

The plan was to corner Fred into the same alley that I was brought to, and extort as much money as we could from him. Fred was this rich and snobby nerd in our school, and everyone knew of how big his mansion was.

The plan was soon executed.

As soon as we spotted Fred walking out of the school gates, we lunged in and hauled him with us. Panic was written all over his freckled face as he struggled to break free.

“Hey! Let me go, this is intolerable, you pigs!” His whines were starting to frustrate me.

In a few minutes, we reached the alley. Danny then signalled for me to start the extortion.

“Give us all of your money.” I demanded fiercely, as I held Fred against the wall of the alley.

“To arrogant fools like… Like you? No!” Fred stuttered as he fought for his dignity.

Just as I was about to threaten him once more, Fred then laid his stick-like arms onto my shoulders, and pushed me. I stumbled back, and the back of my head hit the wall.

A push, and thousands of memories started to flood in my head. The night when my parents were murdered, the night when my father was beaten into a pulp. The night, when my mother was similarly pushed against a wall, and slit by the throat.
I was enraged. All the hatred that I had hidden deep down in my heart was unleashed. Everything overwhelmed me, and I saw red. I instantly grabbed Fred by his neck, and threw him onto the ground.

“What are you doing?” Fred shrieked.

Looking down, I glared at him.

I kneed his stomach, and I delivered a blow onto his nose. Blood soon flowed from it, and Danny and his friends started to cheer on for me. I felt another surge of anger, and I punched Fred again. And again. And again. The rage was uncontrollable.
“It’s shit like you that I despise, you hear that?” I shouted, and I hit Fred on his nose again.

Fred groaned.

“Dave, stop it, it’s enough!” I heard urgency in Danny’s voice as he spoke. Two other jocks then started to hold me back, but that angered me further.

Who are they to stop me? Am I not allowed to be granted power? Like how those murderers had gotten away scot-free?

With all of my strength, I pushed the jocks away, and continued raining punches onto Fred’s face.

When I finally ran out of breath, I stopped.

Fred wasn’t moving anymore. His eyes were rolled back, and his nose was broken.

“Jesus, what have you done Dave? You’ve killed him!” I looked at Danny, as his face turned pale.

“I… I didn’t mean to… I…” I came to my senses, and looking at my blood-stained hands, I realized that I’ve killed Fred.

I got up, and I ran. Blood pulsed through my body, as I tried to think of what to do.

Home.

That’s it. I’ll stay home, wash my clothes, or dump them somewhere, and no one would find out that it was me who killed Fred.

Yes, home.

When I reached home, I slammed the front door shut, and tried to catch my breath. All that running had left me tired, and the strength in my legs had left me. I fell to my knees.

“Dave, what happened?” Upon hearing the door slam, Grandpa awoke from his nap on the couch.

Grandpa made his way towards me, and his eyes widened at the sight of the blood on my hands.

“Dave! What have you done!” Grandpa looked at me and shook my shoulders, hoping for an answer.

“I’ve killed someone Grandpa, what should I do? Help me…” I said feebly, as I looked at his tear-stained face.

Grandpa was lost for words. He staggered back, and held onto the couch for support.
“Turn yourself in, son. You have to. It’s the only way.” Grandpa solemnly looked at me, and replied.

My heart stopped for a second.

“Turn myself in? Are you crazy, Grandpa? They’ll arrest me! I’ll be charged for murder!” I exclaimed.

Grandpa was reaching for the house phone.

“Grandpa, please, you’re supposed to help me!” I frantically shouted.

“I am helping you, Dave. I’m sorry.” With that, Grandpa took the phone, and dialled for the police.

Panic overwhelmed me, and without thinking, I snatched the phone away from Grandpa, and pushed Grandpa away.

A sickening thud was heard as Grandpa’s head landed on the ground first. I dropped the phone.

Remorse filled me as I realized of what I had just done. I rushed over to Grandpa, and I cradled his head. His breathing grew weaker.

“What have I done… Grandpa… I’m sorry… Please…” There was only one thing that I could do, and that was calling for an ambulance.

And I did it.

The ambulance soon came, and I was questioned. The police were called, and I was arrested.

With my hands handcuffed, I was brought into the police car, where I watched Grandpa being wheeled into the ambulance.

Charged for manslaughter, I was sentenced to a lifetime of imprisonment. There was no news of Grandpa. My blond hair was shaved, and I was thrown into a filthy prison cell. The days flew by, and I could not comprehend the guilt that ate me alive, the guilt of probably killing my own grandfather, who was only trying to save me.

Weeks passed, and on one fine day, I was called upon by the police warden.

“You have a visitor.”

Who was it? I wondered. I was pretty sure that Danny and the clique would never talk to me again, and my other relatives would never visit me.

“You have five minutes.” The warden said.

With that, I was lead to a room, and the sight of Grandpa greeted me.

“Grandpa?” I mouthed.

As I sat on the chair, with a telephone in front of me, I started to tear.
There he was, alive and well, my Grandpa.

We picked up the phone, and I held it dearly to my ear.

“Grandpa… I’m sorry that I hurt you… I love you, I do… I’m sorry…” I started sobbing, as I held on tightly to the phone, and looked at my Grandpa.

“Dave, It’s alright… everything will be alright…” Grandpa said gently into the receiver, tears streaming down his face.

With that, he put his right hand onto the glass pane that was separating us, and I did the same. For the first time in that few weeks, I felt a certain sense of warmth and comfort in me.

The End

So firstly, I'd like to thank those that actually took the time to read the entire story. I worked really hard on it, and to be honest, I actually take pride in this story. Secondly, I'd just wanna thank my facilitator, Serene, for her guidance. Without all of her lessons, I'd never be able to produce something like this. Thank you!




I doubt you'll ever change.

I'm honestly sick of this.

Isn't there anything better that you can do, besides coming home and shouting at me for the smallest of things?

I've gotten used to it, but it really dampens my mood.

It's like pouring water all over the Macdonalds Hotcakes that I'm about to eat.

Really.

I honestly do not mean to talk back, but at times, I think that you've stepped over the line.

It's nights like this that I really cannot bite my tongue and swallow down my words.

I think it's pretty crazy of how you hate me for using your toilet, and I'm never allowed to climb onto your side of the bed.

I'm your daughter, for f*ck sake.



If I'm supposed to exist like some alien life form in this house, I'd rather not be here anymore.

I don't even feel hurt anymore, I'm just disgusted and frustrated.

And here I am, ranting about being unable to use your washroom and all, even when we're living under the same roof, just because I'm feeling really angsty now, and my readers probably think that I'm mad.

I wish that I was mad too, but apparently, these things are happening.

Too bad for me, I guess.

Anyway,

I was absent for school today, as I really couldn't bring myself to school for programming.

Met Qi Ying, her friend, An Er and XJ for breakfast @ Causeway Point though.

Qi Ying took a decade to finish her big breakfast, and by the time she was done, they were already running late.

Hence, they decided to be absent for school with me!



Well, we were supposed to plan a surprise for Tyson too, as it was his birthday on this upcoming Sunday! (:

So, we bought a blueberry cake from Breadtalk and we brought it to school.

On the first bread, we then surprised Tyson together with Likhock, Charman and Charlene!

Surprise plan pass, as he didn't know that we were planning to celebrate his birthday for him!

After the celebration, we then separated from them and we proceeded to the library to pass time.

I spent my time playing Harvestmoon on my lappy, XJ played games on his phone, QY and her friend watched a *ahem* comedy, and An Er was... Actually, I'm not sure of what she was doing.

Boyfriend then came to fetch me home, and we watched 'Human Centipede' together. I couldn't stomach the whole show, so I gave up halfway, because my stomach was threatening to spill out my Hotcakes.

There's Archery shooting trials on Monday!

Deciding on whether I should go or not.

I've done my Art Of Story essay too, I'll be uploading it in my next post. (:

Annnnddd, that's it! (:

Love,
Natalie Ishot


UPDATED!




Hello earthlings.

Let's just say, that I almost died.

Why? Simply because I just Kway Teow With Basil Chicken @ Thai Express with Xiu Jun and that little Qi Ying, and please, please please please please, it's so spicy I'm gonna die.

The first bite okay. I literally went, "Ohhh, this is zesty, this is gonna be good."

How wrong could I be?

After subsequent mouthfuls, I think Adele set fire to my throat, as all I could taste was chilli.



I couldn't feel my tongue after that.

Boyfriend was supposed to have eaten dinner with us, but he had a test at 7PM. Hence, he couldn't make it.

Well, but at least, he didn't get the chance to see my cheeks flush as I teared!

And here's to everyone of you.

I've been really lazy with the updates! And I apologize for that. There's simply too much to talk about for this week, and yes, I'm sorry again, because if I hadn't delayed my posts, so much wouldn't have accumulated.

Ah, there. Living above the line!


Let's start off with MBS, shall we? (:

So on Wednesday, I had a sleepover @ Marina Bay Sands with my bestfriends from secondary school, Nerice and Zhiya.

We didn't really do much, but it felt great for being able to spend quality time with them after so long!

By quality time, I meant rushing down to Cold Storage to get cup noodles and sweet drinks. And rushing back up to the hotel room to catch the 9PM drama @ Channel 8. And commenting on how silly the characters in the drama were.



No, I am not kidding you.

Okay okay, but just to redeem that little bit of ourselves from wasting our money by simply eating cup noodles @ MBS, we took a night trip to Gardens By The Bay! (:

It lasted for 1 and a half hours, and we retired to the hotel at about 12:30AM.

Nope, I do not have pictures to show you guys, as well, the pictures were taken by my eyes, instead of a camera.

Sooooo, if you wanna see pictures of the night views, please look into my brain.

Cheesy Level 99.

Anyway, we went to sleep at around 1:30AM, and we woke up @ 6AM to swim.

Here's some pictures (:









The swimming pool was the best, out of everything we did. (:

Especially the Jacuzzi!

After that, we checked out, and we went to Marina Square to catch the movie,


Brave.



Yes, yes. The trailer looked like crap, but guess what?

It was the best Pixar-Disney collaboration.

At least, that's what I think of the movie.

I cried. And Nerice had to expose me.

I still cried.

It's a 5/5 movie, and that means,

Watch it.

And that's all for MBS! (:

The next upcoming event was Sunday's dinner.

Why? Simply because it was the first dinner my boyfriend had with my complete family. <3







And that's it! (:

It's 11:49PM now, and I'm really tired.

it's time to go to sleep now humans! (:

Do stay tuned to my couple blog! ^^

And thank you, for waiting for my delayeddddddddd post.

Love,
Natalie Ishot


I really really need to update this blog.

Give me awhile guys.









So, what does life really mean to you?

Hello beautifuls. (:

It's time for another update!

Let's see. I've been spending a lot of time watching a korean drama online lately, and it's called 'The Fierce Wife'.



Here's the story line.

- Normal everyday couple.

- Wife's cousin moves in to stay with her.

- Husband falls for cousin.

- Husband divorces wife for cousin.

- Wife is devastated, and vows to fight to get her husband back.

- Wife changes into a beautiful woman.

- Husband and cousin's relationship turns rocky as Husband slowly sees the ugly side of cousin.

Andddd, I'll stop going on about this just in case you get bored, or if you're watching it and you don't want me to spoil it.



The main point is that, people change.

They might change for the better, or they might change for the worst.

The reasons for changing is very diverse. It could be due to their own personal wishes to change or it could be due to influence. But mostly, it's just because of one word.

Pain.



I've seen this quote for probably a thousand times before, and yet, I've never really understood it until now.

Well, you see, when we talk about pain, I'm not talking about the ones where you watch korean dramas like me and feel a heartache and then proceed to cry your eyeballs out.



Or when you accidentally hit your hips on the counter and you're like okay, !@#>!* , I'm gonna change myself and lose weight.

No.

When I say pain, I mean like when you've gone through an unforgettable experience that had probably left you crying over nights, hugging your knees to stop yourself from shaking from all that sobbing, having eyes so sore from crying that they're hard to keep open, and you, wanting to just shut yourself off from everyone else and just rot away.

That's pain.

Shit happens. And when the crying stops, you change. It's either you learn from the experience, and make a better life out of it, or you decide to live life lowly because you're unable to forget that pain.

Pain twists you. And sometimes, in the most unimaginable and horrible way.

At times, I don't get people. I don't understand of how they can do such despicable things,



I don't understand how they can keep continuing to hurt people.

And then, it struck me.

Pain.

Forget Disney or Pixar's movies, forget about all that crap about being born evil. That's all rubbish.

Those people, they had probably gone through something that had changed them.

A perfect example would be of how 'Inside every player, lies a broken heart.'

Get what I'm saying?

So, I'd really love to set a target of myself, and that's to be more patient with others, and try to see things from their point of view. Changes don't happen overnight, they take reasons.

But then again, these are no excuse to be hurting people all of the time.

If you're not going to pick yourself up, and you're going to continue to stay that way, it's not pain that changed you.

It was a choice you've made to stay with it.



And that's all for today. (:

There are some thoughts in my mind that I'd really love to clear, I'l have to find a time to confront them soon. Meanwhile, it's all just stashing them into the back of my head.

Would like to end off this post with this kickass tattoo. (;



Hi boyfriend, sleep early for your badminton training tomorrow! <3 br="br">
Goodnight loveliesssss! (:

Love,
Natalie Ishot

Natalie Ishot
14.10.95
RP's NEW MEDIA
Attached to Hans Christian Leonardi on 24.03.12
One little lie of yours,
Crashed my entire world.

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